WAYS TO DIE

If you live in Italy and don’t particularly want to die, the best place to have a heart attack is without a doubt in the bath tub or shower box. The same applies for electrocution or brain haemorrhages. Whatever the cause of imminent death, ensure it happens whilst you are having a wash and you will be fine. Just grab for the white cord and your neighbours will instantly come to rescue you. That, or your husband or wife will faithfully plod to the front door and open it, expecting someone to be there. As no one will be, a few seconds will pass and they will dash into the bathroom to resuscitate you. That is all it takes, one sharp pull of the cord that dangles in every Italian bathroom and you will be saved!